Douche Chills

I didn’t think it could get any worse than the Microsoft Songsmith video.

I find it hard to even believe that this is a real commercial from a company as large as Microsoft. The ad agency responsible has to be comprised of a group of children’s television producers who lost their jobs because even they were too corny for children.

Here’s the Microsoft Songsmith. Enjoy

Commercials are an endless source of chill inducing material. This is a 1970’s ad for Dr. Pepper. The idea here is that if you dance around in tight pants, singing songs about soda, it will make you thirst for that soda.

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Godfather pointed out the incredibly awful “Hold The Line” commercial a while back. If you thought that it couldn’t get any worse than that, you were very wrong. Hold The Line was an installment in a trilogy of douche chill inducing commericals that Mohegan Sun Casino released.

Here they are, all three of them. If the agency that produced these is out there reading. Have some self respect and just say NO. I know you can’t possibly think these are a good idea and some genius at Mohegan is forcing you to produce these.

Superfreak

It’s a very special place
The kind you want to share with others
We really are impressed with the hotel rooms
And they’re very hard to please
Yes I am 
The party’s getting started
At Mohegan Sun
Everyone’s invited 
Everyone use sun 
Mohegan Sun
Mohegan Sun

—-

My Sharona

We’re at Mohegan Sun, having fun 
playing all the games in the big casinos 
But there’s so much more to do 
Get some food, play a round of golf 
or grab a cappuccino 
Now we’re gonna shop til we drop 
Then we’ll hit the spa 
Maybe catch a show before we go 
We never want to say goodbye 
My Mohegan 

—

Hold The Line

Is it in the way they hold the door 
Is it in the way they say hello 
Is it in the way that treat you like friends 
Is it in the way they look or the things that they say and they do 
At the Sun 
That’s just the way that things are done

Quite possibly, the most douche chill inducing commercial ever.